Personal Philosophy

Mother’s Day: A Day Open for Interpretation

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Attention all women: Happy Mother’s Day! (belated as it was technically yesterday-wrote this just before midnight)

Several years ago I sat alone in a greek Orthodox church in Falls Church, Virginia listening to the priest deliver his homily message on a spring Mother’s Day.   Although I can’t recall his specific words, I do recall that he said they would be giving out a single stem flower afterwards to every girl and woman in the room after the church service–this interested me greatly as at the time I wasn’t a mother yet.  He explained that the purpose doing this wasn’t just to avoid any awkward questions as to who was a mother but to also honor the nurturing role that females play in our human society.

This morning I was crawling on my knees between pews and following a darting flash of golden hair and giggles as my youngest demonstrated his toddler skills in another greek Orthodox church here in south Florida.  The priest was delivering his Mother’s Day message by making fun statements that “without mothers nothing would get done” and also alluding that whether any woman was a mother via birth/adoption of children, this day was meant to honor us regardless of being a mother or not.  It was a pleasant deja-vu moment to have the priest announce that a single rose would be given to each female exiting the church in celebration of Mother’s Day.

It was my pleasure to reach out today and wish a “Happy Mother’s Day” greeting to my family and friends whom I know are called “mother” by their roles in their families and rank.  At the same time, it was equally natural to me to recognize and express gratitude to the other women in my life whom I know or have met in passing who have also fulfilled the role as a mother through their selfless giving of themselves to me or my own children.

Happy Mother’s Day!

R.V.S.Bean

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To Disarm Procrastination’s Stranglehold, Grab the Power of the Half Hour

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Encouragement in Sharing

Everyone struggles with procrastination.  It’s a human condition found throughout our time recorded here on Earth and countless are the reasons resulting with the stranglehold we find ourselves in because of procrastination.  It’s an action verb defined by inaction that becomes a noun due to its chronic paralysis in a person.

Why Do We Not-Do?

Lack of energy. Lack of resources. Lack of time. Lack of insight. Straight out toddler-like “No, I don’t wanna…”

Solution-Searching

We could read books on how to combat procrastination and persevere with results–but I personally would procrastinate doing so in deference to the countless other items that are backing up in my internal list.  Like the junk or unwanted/unread emails in your inbox(es) right now, procrastination racks up the casualties of ideas that never reach fruition or duties finding their mission accomplished.

Humble Offering

I’m open to hearing your ideas on this struggle everyone has on a daily basis with the tendency to not get things done that need to, we’re inspired to do and so forth.  My humble idea on the matter has manifested in the past couple months as I find myself barely keeping afloat in my personal sphere of existence: embrace the power of half an hour…30 minutes.

Explanation for Defamation of Procrastination

What I propose is that every day or night–whichever is your “free time” in the day that you are able to steer your ship with how you direct your energies.  For instance, my personal time is usually most evenings after 8:00 p.m. and I’m challenging myself to spend one 30 minute segment each day working on something that I have been putting off consciously for any amount of time.

You may be wondering how 30 minutes a day doing this could really have any sort of effect of worth.  Consider this example: For those of you who like to keep scrapbook albums whether digital or with physical albums.  If you spent 30 minutes on a fairly regular basis working on this ongoing project it would be much more productive than the last 6 months in which you’ve done nothing (don’t be embarrassed, I’m on a 8 month dry streak from my scrapbooking piles that continue to grow in dust and photo accumulation).

Cheering: You Can Do It!

Proof that this half-hour power can battle procrastination and win? I just wrote this short blog in the space of 30 minutes after having not written in many, many days and having topics to write about fill my head and yet bind my hands somehow from typing them out to share.  If I can get something done in the space of half an hour I believe most people can too.  Power over procrastination O human nation!

R.V.S.B.

Note: Another website I must stop procrastinating from updating with more art, http://www.ramonabean.com

 

 

 

President Hillary Rodham Clinton: Hope for Women, Democratics and Republicans Alike

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My Political Confession

When I was just an emerging teenager I was excited to get my hands on a Clinton/Gore campaign sign and proudly tacked it onto my busy bedroom wall–the “Pinterest” way of doing things back in 1992 was to clutter one’s wall with quotes, photos of celebrity crushes and so forth.  I couldn’t vote yet but I knew what it was to be on welfare and food stamps as my single mother of three children struggled to recover economically after escaping an abusive marriage and I liked what Bill Clinton said as I listened to him late at night playing saxophone and speaking with Arsenio Hall.

After September 11, 2001 I found myself moving to Washington, DC as a newlywed in January 2002 where I would embark on an amazing journey in just over half a decade’s time where I would serve several positions as congressional staff in the U.S. House of Representatives for a couple of Members–one of which was infamously known for the U.S. House Page scandal that preceded the fall of the GOP in mid-term 2006 election cycle.  In the wake of fall of 2006 I was able to accept the opportunity to serve President George W. Bush’s administration in the U.S. Department of the Treasury.

As the 2008 Presidential election debates waged before the respective Democratic and Republican conventions, I personally had just given birth to my first child and was reeling in the awesome responsibility and reality of my new occupation–politics seemed like a poorly written drama series that I watched bleary-eyed during frequent feeding for my newborn.  I understood and was at peace with that after 8 years of a Republican president who had been bludgeoned in public opinion here at home and abroad afforded the Democrats a clear path to the presidency.  Of course the question remained who would it be?

During the 2008 Presidential campaign our country witnessed an amazing possibility for two people of minority status (one a bi-racial man and another a woman), one of which would go on to win the Democratic nomination and the overall election most decidedly–namely President Barack Obama, our first bi-racial president.  Hillary Rodham Clinton, however, I personally felt was the woman for the job and although I’m a Republican, I believed in her ability to serve our nation as the first woman President and conduct herself fairly amongst the two major political parties.

Where Is Hillary Today?

It’s still less than 100 years ago that women in the United States of America were afforded the right to vote.  The right to vote!  If only we could describe the ridiculous nature of that reality to the young women today–that truly, women who bear life to men, support men, love men and ultimately will many times sacrifice for men, were not allowed to vote in matters of government.

It was a bitter pill to swallow to watch a woman who had every right and ability to serve our nation as President to be beat in some unfriendly exchanges and by political machinery supporting our present POTUS (President of the United States).  At the same time, it was impressive to witness how Mrs. Clinton took the loss and then proceeded to accept the opportunity to serve as our Secretary of State.  If you were paying attention to the weekly reports, she did a most impressive job at it up to her resignation recently.

Where is Hillary today? There is some silence with a distinct shuffling sound heard in the background–the power deck is being shuffled and perhaps the groundwork is being laid down.  You can conduct your own internet search via Google or other search engines: my own yielded a recent report from a Greek American online outlet http://usa.greekreporter.com/2013/02/11/exclusive-hillary-clinton-will-run-for-president-in-2016-confirmed/

2016: Change Will Happen, Is There Hope for Women?

There has been so much flux in most Americans lives in the past several years–maybe it’s the acceleration of our technology, our vulnerability to crazy things like terrorists or that we’re trying to find our bearings in a new global economy that reels almost daily from our connectivity.  What we do know is that anything is possible nowadays, especially in the realm of politics.

Although it was easy to attack President Obama for his lack of executive experience when he first entered the White House as our POTUS, we should be thankful that he helped pave the way for his successors.  It turns out that there is no perfect resume for this job–the best prerequisite for this work is dependent on the character of the person and their ability to adapt and proceed forward successfully despite the unexpected (public marital infidelity: i.e. blue dress), harassing public opinion (upon first being elected as NY senator), being disrespected on the campaign trail (Google anything from 2008 campaign shorts) and the list goes on for Hillary Rodham Clinton.

At this very moment I cannot formulate my ultimate opinion on the question on who it could be but I remain hopeful that there will be a woman President of the United States in this century and I believe it is possible to be a Republican and support a Democrat–as a Floridian I’m proud to say that many voters in our state have been this way for decades.  My encouragement to you is to do your own research on the candidates in the next Presidential election and then search yourself as to what you feel is best for our nation.

What Democrats, Republicans and any other political party believers can agree on is that there is no absolute party that is the best for the U.S.  We are free to discuss, debate and decide–we then have the personal right to try to support whoever (or whichever party) ends up leading our nation through the next round.  The political pendulum continues whether our man or woman wins the election, as Americans we must keep up hope and work together regardless of the results each time.

R.V. Saridakis Bean

RomneyRyan Florida Sunset

 

 

 

 

Modern American Marriage in 2013: An Institution between Two Adults of any Religion, Color, Race, Gender or Sexual Orientation?

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Note:  I have been moved by this subject matter for over a decade and most recently my personal world has been rocked by how this topic has proceeded in our country causing division and confusion.  This post is meant to help myself and others see that we can’t ignore the issue and must see the truth—regardless of what our personal comfort levels may or may not be.  –RVSB

Jealousy Felt Around the World

What’s both great and arrogant about our United States of America is the plethora of freedoms that we really do enjoy in comparison with the rest of the nations on Earth.  While there is debate as to whether or not our economic status or stock market powerhouse still yields the same influence as it has in decades past—there can be no argument that this is still the best nation in the world when it comes to our religious and social freedoms that natives and immigrants (and even not-yet-legal immigrants) have access to thrive.

What is the Definition of Marriage?

When most of us were children, it never occurred to us that anything other than a man and a woman defined the basic ingredients for a marriage.  Needless to say, it’s 2013 today and our world’s consciousness on the matter has hit an open range of possibilities.  Consider for a moment that in Islam, for example, a man can take for himself up to four wives as long as he can provide for his respective spouses and offspring thereof.

What dictates the definition of marriage usually depends on who is answering the question: for instance, someone of a conservative Christian background will repeat their religion’s conventional or Bible scripture wisdom on the matter while there remain sects of Mormon believers that still practice polygamy.

There’s no doubt, however, that public opinion is in a full debate whether the same gender or various sexual orientation unions should or should not be considered as standard marriage material.  Why is this even a question anymore?

What’s Not New Under the Sun

Here’s what we do know—anthropologists and historians would agree—there have always been heterosexuals, homosexuals and bisexuals in our human race.   Most recently we’ve had the medical-breakthrough ability to manipulate hormones and such that individuals committed to doing so can change their sex (especially in the case of those who may be born with both sexual organs and seek to be one or the other).

It can be verified and inferred that there have been countless marriages involving homosexuals that have married a heterosexual, a bisexual married a heterosexual or any other combination.  Throw in any transsexuals or cross-dressers and the complexities continue.  We are lying to ourselves if we don’t already recognize the fact that these legal marriages have existed.

Common law marriage?  There have probably been more homosexual and/or bisexual unions that qualify to be a common law marriage than in the strictly heterosexual circles!  It’s just that they haven’t been detailed as recognizable by our state’s laws.

What Matters Most: Comfort or Conformity?

 The truth remains that in the U.S. you can get married either by a secular or a religious person and be recognized as a legally married couple by federal law according to each state’s laws—the lines between church and state have been blurred at this point and therefore leave room for the freedom of two legally consenting adults to be married despite their physical gender, religious or political affiliation, race (like bi-racial as in the case of our very own President of the United States) or sexual orientation.  In other words, there’s really no reason that gays (or bisexuals, etc) cannot be recognized as a legal marrying sort.

How Do We Go Down the Aisle of Acceptance?

While the U.S. Supreme Court has been in the news recently because of two cases before them, including a proposition situation in California after the elections in November 2012—they cannot ultimately fix this unfortunate glitch.

The hopeful signs, however, are that more lawmakers by the weeks and months passing are beginning to break their silence over the matter and show support for those seeking the ability to get married regardless of whether they are the same gender or have a sexual orientation other than “heterosexual”.

If there is one thing I would like to say in terms of a request from my American peers, it would be that we please stop trying to politicize this issue of allowing non-heterosexuals to participate in the legal action of marriage and its rights therein.  Although it may seem like it’s mostly Republicans against this, it’s simply not fair to those Republicans that don’t mind or simply don’t care.

Love is love and in America where we pride ourselves in being created equal, we must accept that whoever wants to walk that aisle of selflessness to bond with another imperfect person to face the world’s joys and sorrows is truly an inalienable human right.

R.V.Saridakis Bean

P.S. For those who are Christian like myself and would tell me that I should consider that homosexuality is regarded as a sin in various scripture quotes and interpretations–I would immediately remind them there is nothing seen or unseen that goes unnoticed by our Creator.  We are all sinners.  Again, this question as to whether non-heterosexuals should be able to participate in a federal/state-recognized legal marriage is irrelevant as American marriage is not exclusive to only those in the Christian religions.

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I Spy the i-Generation…Momm-i, Dadd-i?

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digital blog 4-1-2013

What Can I do?

If you’re a parent, please read this now or when you have a moment, “The Touch-Screen Generation” by Hanna Rosin in The Atlantic: http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2013/04/the-touch-screen-generation/309250/

Quick Review

If you’re a busy parent like every other parent, here is a short review and discourse of this article. Ms. Rosin is also a parent and writes this candid piece in the wake of attending an event in spring of 2012 where a group of developers of children’s apps for phones and tablets met in Monterey, California—a short drive south of Silicon Valley—in order to show and tell about their respective games and programs.

 Today’s i-Reality

As fast our fingers can swipe on these touch –screen gadgets is how pervasive their presence in our lives have become. The American Academy of Pediatrics has not been able to keep up with the technology as it struggles to report on its policy about young children being exposed to various media (we all remember the under-2 years old not so good for TV exposure). How many of us have witnessed the child in the high-chair dining nearby with an iPad to boot? How many of us are that parent(s) who have handed over the iPhone in desperation at the post office as the line snakes around for twenty people or so?

 i AM the parent i AM!

“Norman Rockwell never painted Boy Swiping Finger on Screen, and our vision of a perfect childhood has never adjusted to accommodate that now-common tableau.” –Hanna Rosin, “The Touch-Screen Generation” The Atlantic

You are still the parent no matter what technology shows up in our world today. Truly you are still the gate-keeper for your little one(s) who need human touch more than a touch-sensitive tin screen that is derived from horrible mining conditions parallel to the “blood diamond” controversy in recent decades.

Research? Doesn’t really exist yet on whether or not the good outweighs the bad in terms of a child’s exposure to these gizmos and gadgets that get smaller, smarter and faster as the months pass. What hasn’t changed is that you still are the best gauge to measure what’s right and wrong for your children. Ms. Rosin found it interesting that when she spoke with some of the children’s app developers about how they approached their home rules when it came to screen time—she got answers like “no screen time during the week”, “on the weekends, they can play. I give them a limit of half an hour and then stop. Enough. It can be too addictive, too stimulating for the brain” and “one said only on airplanes and long car rides”.

Personally, with a toddler and preschooler now in my stewardship, my husband and I find no reason for them to need to use touch-screens right now. There will be no learning curve for them to master as this stuff is so easy that it makes watching TV seem like a chore. Seriously, I witnessed a 90-year old yesterday using “face time” on the iPad at a friend’s home. At the same time, I do allow them to utilize the touch-screens at museums and to witness peers using them—please forgive the reference, but I can’t be Amish about this subject with my children, they are aware these technologies exist (especially as one of their beloved relatives is a computer engineer).

 Complex Answers to Simple Swipes

“The reason many kids’ apps are grouped under ‘Education’ in the iTunes store, I suspect, is to assuage parents’ guilt (though I also suspect in the long run, all those ‘educational’ apps merely perpetuate our neurotic relationship with technology, by reinforcing the idea that they must be sorted vigilantly into ‘good’ or ‘bad’”. –Hanna Rosin

There are so many ways to approach this question as to whether exposure to these digital technologies will help or hinder our children. If you thought what we feed our children was a concern, this one is an alarming obsession since we ourselves are busy trying to learn the new gadget in our hands before our kid gets a hold of it and masters it in less than half the time it took us to find where to tappity-tap.

Ms. Rosin says what I feel as well:
“Every new medium has, within a short time of its introduction, been condemned as a threat to young people. Pulp novels would destroy their morals, TV would wreck their eyesight, video games would make them violent…There are legitimate broader questions about how American children spend their time, but all you can do is keep them in mind as you decide what rules to set down for your own child.”

Enjoy the Ride

As parents in the early part of the 21st century, we can’t complain about being bored with this awesome responsibility of raising the next generation who will likely see this 22nd century bring about new technologies we can hardly fathom. I hope we can impart to them the importance of love for each other, for our natural resource (Creation in general) and a healthy curiosity for the unknown and ever-changing landscape of our human creativity.

R.V. Saridakis Bean

 Book and Reading Recommendations:

  •  “Screen Time” by Lisa Guernsey and her website http://www.lisaguernsey.com
  •  “From Digital Natives to Digital Wisdom: Hopeful Essays for 21st Century Learning” by Marc Prensky and his website http://www.marcprensky.com
  •  “Last Child in the Woods: Saving Our Children from Nature-Deficit Disorder” by Richard Louv

Why Weed Within: Seashell Philosophy by She – Part 8 in a Series

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Note: This series usually includes philosophical reflections during my visits to the beach, most often the Atlantic Ocean coast. This post, however, is an exception to this style as it came during my time in our garden about 15 minutes west of our beloved shoreline.

Wierd Winter

In general, gardening or farming in South Florida thrives during the winter months as the sunshine is less strong than during our sweltering summer season. Varieties like broccoli, squash and strawberries come in tasty bounties from December through March. Heavy growing in a small gardens also includes weeds of every shape and strength.

Why Weed: Pros and Cons

I’ve always assumed that weeds should be taken care of right away upon the first sight of them in your garden space. That naive assumption has been overwhelmed by the reality that weeds can invade more quickly than we’d like and the question becomes “why and when do I weed?”

Did you know that weeds actually benefit the soil by their very existence? I didn’t know this tidbit until recently in my self-taught journey of tilling the soil. All my life I believed that all weeds were bad and need to be eradicated. It turns out many can actually benefit a garden environment by balancing the soil’s composition and affecting the insect population. A British website called Plants for a Future is one of the many in cyberspace that has great information for any of you interested in learning more about how weeds can benefit: http://www.pfaf.org/user/cmspage.asjustpx?pageid=44

At the same time, it’s not advised that we start planting weeds en masse or allowing them to take over. They can strangle weaker plants, repel certain types of plants and overall wreck havoc in a garden’s design.

Weeds Within Us All

Yesterday I continued the work I began a couple weeks ago following my return from a 5 week trip away from home. A gardener’s bittersweet emotion is coming back to their garden after a long absence: anxious to see what’s happened, both good and bad.

The initial shock of seeing all the weeds that had hidden my humble garden wore off after a couple days and I set to working little by little each day to remove them. The hardest part has been overcoming the procastination that paralyzes me when looking at what needs to be done.

As I pull weeds from their roots, I imagine I’m also pulling at those inclinations inside my spirit that I’ve allowed to take hold and sometimes dictate illogically what’s the best way to react to persons and situations.

My grapevines are in a frozen stranglehold that makes it difficult to discern which is weed and which is the true vine: I have to prune with my steel cutter carefully so I can be certain to remove the hindering plant(s). This reminds me of how when I’m facing a behavior pattern or addiction that I cannot just pull out every facet at random. It must be a multi-step process with care to every detail, enabling true freedom and healing that will endure future entrapment.

One day, when life may afford me more free time, I hope to learn the names of some of the beneficial weeds that I encounter in my garden every year. As I pulled more yesterday and shook the soil out from their groping roots, I could see how there were vegetable and herb plants around them that weren’t hurting–they looked stronger for having had to bicker with the assaulting weed beside them. How often we can all agree that going through tough or sticky circumstances or personal relationships have help strengthen our character’s resolve to strive to still live for the good and love of all?

Weed On: Whether Garden or Soul

I hope this short piece can help any reading as we are all gardeners, if not of the soil, definitely of our soul. May you find Peace always.

R.V. Saridakis Bean

Race Review: Why, Where and What is Ragnar Relays Race Series?

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Team photo post-race

RAGNAR RELAYS 2013

Reflections Intro

Although I am still nursing a destroyed body inside and out–I find myself looking forward to the next opportunity to compete in a relay race as I did this past weekend at the Ragnar Relay series race that featured a route from Miami to Key West, Florida.  This was a 197 mile journey that in my case was split up by 12 runners on a team with the support of 2 vans.  Our team’s name was “In It to Win It” and finish 2nd in our sub-masters division with a time of 26:49.

What is Ragnar?

The best way to start reading up on this racing series is to visit their website at http://www.ragnarrelay.com .  My yeoman’s explanation is that this is a pretty well-organized race given its scope and does require that participants run the course at their own risk as roads are not closed for this event.  Along the way there are barricades and some race event folks that are at key intersections or shifts in the course–still, there are the occasional lost runners and I was nearly one of those a couple of times during our event this past weekend.  Teams may consist of 6 or 12 people and they are assigned respective running legs (3-12 miles appx) throughout the course to help share the load of competition.

Where Do We Run?

The Ragnar Relay series has different races throughout the country during the year in beautiful places like Napa Valley, Arizona and of course Florida!  I can speak for the Miami-Key West route:  it was a nice blend of city life both scenic and cultural (whether it was ritzy or ghetto) and rural, farm or swampy canal backwoods.  As my team began at 2:oopm on Friday, January 4 and we finished the next day at 4:49pm, we ran overnight with safety measures like reflective vests, headlamps and back lights.  I thought maybe this was a little extreme–until I found myself running at night in pitch darkness by myself unable to see the next runner in front of me.

Why Do Such a Crazy Thing?

Unless you are a runner, it’s nearly impossible to explain to you how amazing and fun this experience is despite the sleeplessness, the port-a-johns and funky smells from the constant sweat and endless miles.

I personally did 4 legs and was grateful for the chance to participate in this event even with the short notice–I was called a few weeks ago and asked if I would be interested and I immediately said yes to my former University of Florida teammate.  It was awesome to compete again with 3 former teammates from my lady Gator days and it was a bonus to meet other athletes and be instant teammates through this race.

Some people like to find their inner peace through a quiet state of meditation or prayer in a private place.  My personal moment of truth in my spirit was found somewhere during my 3rd leg of 8.8 miles (the 13th leg) that included a portion of the run that couldn’t have van support.  The severe potholes and width of maybe 12 feet in some parts of a gravel path through Florida vegetation made it obvious why I found myself alone running (or sprinting for a prolonged period of time) and searching my mind for distraction from the paralyzing fear that threatened.

I was able to focus on what matters to me in my life and to think about love for others–before I knew it the nearly 9 mile leg was over as my thoughts had transformed to understand that although my body ached with pain and fatigue, I knew my mind could tell my legs otherwise and push forward.

Respect for Ragnar Competitors

It was especially inspiring to be around other teams who had fun names and messages scrawled on their vans: examples included Prom Dates, Boners and No Dudes 12 Boobs.  When I was running through some stretches I would hear vans beeping their support in addition to our team and it was very helpful. I tried to repay the favor when driving our van for others and if we saw a runner in distress we would check if they needed water or Gatorade from our stash.  Even the early morning breakfast at a random IHOP on the road yielded a feeling of fellowship with other teams who were also trying to catch their breath before the next series of legs.

When is the Next One?

Honestly, I’m hooked after competing this past weekend–what a great idea for former cross-country and track teammates from school days, co-workers, running clubs or just a hodge-podge of people like our team “In It to Win It” was comprised of to work together.  This type of event can bring both the best and the worst out of people.  What better analogy of life to work through with others while having fun and accomplishing the simple but amazing feat of completing a nearly 200 mile race!

Happy Trails,

R.V.S.B.

Why Banning Guns and Buying Homeschool Guide May Not Be the Answer

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Note: It cannot be said enough, may all our hearts and spirits continue to send love and pray for those affected by today’s shooting at the Connecticut elementary school.

TODAY

For most parents, today’s news will hit us as 9/11 did in that we will remember where we were, whom we were with and how quickly we wanted to get back to our children if they weren’t already physically with us.

In the quick moments I was able to share with other parents today I heard and read about a couple of things that concern me because it’s too reminiscent of that knee-jerk reaction we humans have when confronted with appalling behavior by another human(s).

TOMORROW

Gun ban or gun control will be the word buzzing in the aftermath of today’s tragedy in Connecticut–perhaps even more so than when recent senseless shootings have occurred in our nation like Columbine, Beltway sniper shooters, the Arizona congresswoman and the Kansas City Chief football player.  Unfortunately there is no true control over the sickness or outright evil that may transpire in one’s mind to execute such horrific outcomes in taking other lives.  Banning guns completely to the public in our nation may help cut down gunshot crimes and yet would also mean that the possibility would rise we’d be seeing crime scenes so awful that would make Edgar Allen Poe blush.

Homeschooling:  Although I am personally in favor of homeschooling, it’s not because of random, unthinkable moments like today and Columbine.  It’s understandable that many parents and caregivers these days are a nervous wreck when dropping off the children at a school that may have them be exposed to drugs, sex, violence, verbal abuse by bullies or some kid who was disgruntled and sick arriving to massacre.  These days there are so many choices for a child’s education that we cannot blindly choose homeschooling or any other option out of fear that our children will be vulnerable–again, we cannot control this random variable manifest by illness or pure evil.

FULL CIRCLE

There certainly needs to be a lengthy conversation on whether we need to consider various new regulations on issuing gun licenses and purchases but let’s not “invade Iraq” by trying to take away the right to bear arms.

The issue of safety at the educational institution is in a constant state of revision and it will continue to take the faculty, students and families of those students to find what is the right path at this time.

May we find a way to get through this for those close to the pain and those who hurt for them.

R. V. Saridakis Bean

Seashell Philosophy by She: Part 7 in a Series

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Winter Waves with Why’s Sighs

Winter Waves Dec 2012

Shore Snapshot

Walking up to the ocean yesterday I saw bursts of blue and white as the surf coming was churning—pelicans and other sea birds dove in and out of the breaking waters to grab fish that were perilously swimming near the surface.

As my children and I set up our minor camp devoted to playing in the sand and snacking, I was upset to see that there was more trash than usual on the shoreline.  I grabbed one of the extra plastic bags I had arrived with and set to work.  It’s become an automatic part of my beach ritual—shortly after setting up our spot in the sand, I start picking up any trash within sight and sometimes walk further on to take care of any debris/refuse I see.  I’m not better than anyone else for doing this.  A switch went off in me one day and I began picking up any garbage at the beach because it’s just the right thing to do.

Switching Sandlots

Sorting through the mounds of seaweed I found everything from plastic forks, drink bottle caps and other random human artifacts.  It occurs to me that we are so busy with our things that we consume and the people we associate ourselves with.  Without meaning to, we can become pretty cold and detached with each other whether we know each other or not.

There are simply times in life that we need to do the right thing regardless of whether we get recognition.  If everyone who visited the beach worldwide picked up whatever trash they ever saw no matter who noticed them—I don’t think we’d even know that litter on seashores was an issue at all.  It’s amazing how powerfully beneficial we can be when we work in unison toward the common goal.  Taking personal responsibility is a remarkably simple, singular concept that our human society is nearly incoherent in while we advance with break-brain speed in digital technologies.

My Sand Thanks Your Sand

Later in the day I ended up at the local mall and unexpectedly walked up to the Santa Claus photo line with my children in tow.  It was during that cranky late afternoon that most parents care to avoid as I was plowing throw at this moment and a young man came up to us with a pleasant greeting.   That he managed to get one of my kids smiling after having just been in the throes of a tantrum was a welcome miracle.  It’s amazing how such a little kindness can have such a grand flood of gratitude in its wake.

Unfortunately, given our frantic pace these days in our respective lives, it is more common for those waves of thankfulness to be followed by a calm sea of inaction.  I am thoroughly guilty of this on a continuous basis.  The best thing we can do is try to reach out and let those people or entities (like a company) know that we are appreciative.

After our Santa Claus meet-greet-photo-and print adventure, I took a mall comment card and wrote in detail my thanks to the photo staff.  Pushing my active children in a massive double stroller I maneuvered to the Mall Information desk and after they asked what they could do for me I replied, “Just want to say thanks!” and handed them my completed comment card.  The three ladies stared at me aghast and the one in the middle said, “We hardly ever hear something say thanks or something good, usually complaints.”   We are so programmed to just accept negative and dole out more of the same.   This is an energy cycle by people today that yields little if not more negative return in the future.  Why don’t we just start in the little ways to say “thank you” already?  Why not try to put more positive and focus on what’s working well than always reverting to what’s wrong?

Back to the Beginning: Sand and Sea (See?)

As complicated as our problems have become on a geo-political scale and can make the masses feel paralyzed and powerless—the reality remains that we can individually make a major difference in how we simply deal with ourselves and each other.

Let’s try to do what we know is the right thing whether or not anyone is watching.  You see litter, pick it up.  You see someone needing physical help, offer it.  Instead of us always thinking someone else will do it, let’s be the “someone” and operate as though no one ever sees it’s you doing it.

Those who raised us told us to do it and we tell the next generation the same: say “Thank you.”  Let’s try to go beyond just the words and understand that it helps to send a “pearl” letter or note to an employer describing how good your experience was with this particular employee(s).  Have we noticed an increase in request for surveys?  There are many reasons for that and I believe one of them is to know if people are happy with services/people.  Let’s take it to a more personal level, why not send a snail mail note to parent or loved one who helped you when you were growing up and tell them so?

Just try,

R.V.S.B.

Greeks sigh too, a haunting ballad to the sea: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=seru4FXuydg&NR=1&feature=endscreen

 

Making Love With Words – Seashell Philosophy by She

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MAKING LOVE WITH WORDS

Seashell Philosophy by She: Part 6 in Series

Act 1: The Stage Background

This morning in Palm Beach County, Florida we were blessed with a beautiful sunrise scene that showcased scattered clouds reflecting a shattered rainbow in the color scheme—a fantastic visual that made me drunk with that same seductive emotion that overcomes us when in love.

There are so many words for love in my parents’ native language of Greek: in the Ancient Greek it breaks down to four main ones and I’ve gleaned the following information from www.en.wikipedia.org .  Agape means “love” as in “I love you” with traditional qualities in its definition.   Eros is a passionate sort of love that can apply to anything more than just a friendship and although sensual in nature that doesn’t have to be defined as sex-lust kind.  Philia can mean friendship or affectionate love in Modern Greek and is mostly as that general kind of love between friends, family and community but can include lovers and mutual events.  Storge is the affection felt for the relationships like between a parent and child.

Act 2: Back to the Beach

This alluring morning beckoned me to take my sons in tow with a picnic plus shore gear and head to one of our favorite spots: Juno Beach by Loggerhead Park.  As we walked across A1A and to the edge of where the sand clings to the asphalt, we got the first glimpse of a calm Atlantic Ocean kissing the shoreline.

The sky still had a wallpaper of clouds and seemed to drip into the ocean’s horizon line—the color scheme now had switched to the hues of blue, white and light grays that had a calming effect following the rapturous sunrise we’d endured hours earlier.

The shells were plentiful in quantity as well as quality—even the rocks and coral pieces were intermixed, a cornucopia of gifts from the tide going out.  I noticed that there were some people around but everyone seemed to keep to themselves.  My sons and I made a presence by the sheer fact that we were digging in sand, building structures, picking up trash, running in and out of the shoreline, myself leaping into the beckoning blue sea with the glee that my youngest displayed as he broke down castles smaller than he.

Act 3: How Do We Love By Talking?

As I was enjoying a simple day at the shore with my sons I realized that most people here today were also attracted to the inviting blue water and the abundance of shells.  The way the waves broke over the line of shells and rocks provided a great game consisting of spotting a shell that you wanted and then lunging downward to pick it up before the water took it back again.

After recent articles and books I’ve read about how our human society is battling loneliness despite increased inter-connectivity via our mobile devices and computers—it hit me that we are all able to battle this unnecessary tragedy of feeling isolated when here were a bunch of people today all at the beach for various reasons but for this moment in time we are together.

So I used the obvious icebreaker of saying something to someone about the shell-picking opportunities today or remarking about the boat offshore experiencing an engine fire.  I made it a point to speak to everyone who came within 12 feet or so of me or my children.  It became easier after the first few people and it was enlightening to engage in conversation with everyone.  After about an hour or two I felt so comfortable and relaxed—it seemed everyone else did to as the dozen or so folks in this area who hadn’t been talking to each other now were and even shell-picking or enjoying the surf in closer proximity than before when it seemed everyone had been in their own invisible cubicles just past the high tide line.

Act 4: Love, Love, Love

I was filled with joy today.  I simply lived in the moment of being at the beach, engaging with other people around us and digging my hands in the sand, leaping into the surf, dodging waves for the next best shell.  By far the best part was the love of today.  It wasn’t just my sons that I loved as I handed them refreshments and played with them.  I loved reaching out to other beach-loving spirits and sharing with them as I learned from them.  I truly believe that each time people connect with words it is a form of loving each other if only that it affirms we are not alone.

We all need love and as there are so many kinds of love and ways to give love, why not give as much as we can even in the little ways?  Maybe we make life too complicated—sure we have the trials and the unexpected tragedies that we must weather in a fallen world like Earth but how much stronger are we when we face these things together?  I wish us all more Love in the time we are living now as it is the one thing that is priceless, timeless and most vital to our survival here.

R. V. Saridakis Bean